Forgiveness is not easy, but possible

Forgiveness isn’t easy but it’s possible. Some people think that forgiving someone means they’ve condoned their behavior, or that they’re excusing the person’s actions. But forgiveness is a decision you make, not an emotion you feel. It doesn’t mean that everything is fine now and the person who hurt us will never do so again. And it doesn’t mean that we have to forget what happened—forgetting can make us vulnerable to being hurt again. We must recognize that we don’t want to remain mired in anger and grief. Give yourself permission to move forward on your own terms.

Forgiveness is a decision, not an emotion

Forgiveness is a decision, not an emotion. We make a choice to not hold on to the negative feelings that come from being hurt by someone. Your heart may still ache, but choosing to let go of resentment and anger helps you move forward with peace in your spirit.

But…it’s important to understand what forgiveness does not mean:

• Forgiveness does not mean that you forget about what happened or sweep it under the rug as if it never happened at all; rather, it means that you acknowledge and accept that it has happened without judgment or blame towards another person (or yourself).
• Forgiveness also doesn’t mean allowing someone who has hurt or wronged you off scot-free—it means letting go of any negative feelings towards them while still holding them accountable for their actions (for example, calling them out when they treat others poorly). In order for reconciliation between two parties to take place after an incident of abuse/mistreatment/betrayal/etc., both parties must be willing participants; this may mean forgiving one person while another person needs further accountability and reparations before moving forward with forgiveness themselves!

Forgiveness doesn’t mean you condone bad behavior

Forgiveness is a process that takes time and effort. It’s not condoning the bad behavior, it’s not forgetting the lessons learned, and it’s not forgetting what happened. Forgiveness means you have acknowledged that something hurtful happened in your life, but you’ve decided to let go of anger toward the person who caused you pain or grief in order to move forward with your life. You might feel an initial surge of anger when someone does something hurtful because let’s face it—it feels terrible! But if you want to heal from those feelings and move on with your life without them weighing down on your heart every day then forgiveness is necessary.

Forgiveness isn’t a one-time event

You can choose to forgive or not. You don’t have to feel forgiving in order to make the choice—in fact, if you’re feeling angry or hurt by someone who has wronged you, it’ll be much easier for you to forgive if you focus on your own needs first instead of trying to get them back for what they did.

Forgiveness isn’t something that happens all at once; it’s a process that takes time and effort (just like anything else worth doing). It involves recognizing that there are some things we cannot change about other people and ourselves—and then finding ways both small and large for us to move forward from these realities into more positive territory in our lives together as human beings.

You don’t have to forget to forgive

When you forgive someone, you don’t have to forget the bad things they did. You can absolutely still remember what they did to hurt or humiliate you. You can absolutely still remember how badly they treated you, and feel justified in your hurt and anger toward them.

Forgiveness doesn’t mean that everything is okay now and we should all just be friends again. It means that I recognize that my relationship with this person isn’t based on their actions, it’s based on my own needs for security and belonging. If I want those needs met, then maybe forgiving them will help me let go of some anger so I can focus on moving forward with my life instead of looking back at what was done wrong in the past.

Forgive, but remember so you can protect yourself in the future

It is also okay if you don’t feel like forgiving someone right now or ever. It could take time for you to get there if this person was very close to your heart and caused great pain. If someone hurts us deeply enough, we may need professional help from a therapist before we can let go of our anger toward them completely (or at all). We know that forgiving can be challenging, but remember: forgiveness doesn’t just help them; it helps you, too!

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