I was terrified.
I wasn’t terrified of the photo shoot. I was looking forward to spending the day with my friend, Michelle Johnson, and Felicia Reed whose personality is like confetti exploding from a cannon. I’m very much an introvert and enjoy people who get me out of my shell.
I wasn’t terrified at how the photos turned out. With a little makeup and a fantastic photographer, my pictures turned out incredible.
I WAS terrified of the public seeing them. I was terrified that people would think I’m trying to be something that I’m not. I was terrified that I couldn’t live up to how the images portrayed me to be. “Who does she think she is?” Nobody has ever said that to me. But I said it to myself.
Instead of hiding them in a drawer, I made them my Facebook profile pictures. I’m using one as my headshot for my business and I printed a 14×11 of the other, framed it and displayed it on my dresser. “OMG, what will people think if they see that in my bedroom?”
So here’s the result. When I look at the pictures every day, I cringe a little less and build a little more confidence. I see my bridal portrait at 25 years old right next to my portrait at 56. I see a successful 56 year old woman, who has life wisdom, who is working her second successful career, enjoying a 30+ year marriage and helping her adult sons navigate this crazy world. I am proof that a shy, timid, introvert can be bold and beautiful and successful. And these portraits by Felicia Reed are a brilliant illustration of who I truly am.
But you want to know the MOST TERRIFYING thing? Posting this story about myself. If I can do all of this…you can too.
by Malesa Brauckman